


Third Time's Not the Charm

by rujakcuka



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-29 00:59:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19819264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rujakcuka/pseuds/rujakcuka
Summary: In which Bertolt holds Annie two times due to her menstrual pain and one time he doesn’t.





	Third Time's Not the Charm

**Author's Note:**

> i write for fun but also with _feels_.

The first time Bertolt holds Annie, they are eleven and it is bloody disturbing.

He’s reading a book when she suddenly groans in pain and begins to curl her body. It’s been several days since she first complained that her head had—has—been feeling like a spinning wheel. The ceiling on the shelter they’ve been staying at looks like it’s waving. The dizziness is bad, but she never groaned before, adding that she’d been sleeping quietly for some time before.

Alarmed, the dark-haired boy checks her up, “Annie, is something wrong? Tell me where it hurts.”

His friend fails to answer him. Panic begins growing in his sense as she hisses a little. Her lips form a straight line, too hurt to tell. Her face complexion is pale but it’s paler now. A pair of blue eyes looks at him with tears which are ready to fall anytime.

Reiner’s out there looking for something to fill three stomachs; they don’t care if it’s even stolen. Bertolt knows how to perform first aid, but is clueless when it comes to comprehending a female’s body, since it’s a foreign thing and a little different from his.

Annie touches her lower stomach, which has been covered in a thin blanket, to do what he’d told her to. It’s a sunny day and obviously he finds her using it strange. She grits her teeth. The lower part of her stomach feels like it’s been hammered—also feels like being punched and treated like a sack. Her head’s throbbing and her body feels like floating.

She doesn’t say anything.

So Bertolt has to uncover the blanket.

It’s a lie if he says that he’s not terrified to see the blood on her crotch and it’s smearing on her pants and sheet. She’s in pain—injured—and currently cannot get herself in full control. He realizes something frightening: Annie’s been trying not to accidentally transform and it’s the end of them if she fails.

“Oh my God, Annie!” The boy shrieks, his green eyes widened and his body trembling in fear. He looks at his left and right to seek help, but the shelter’s currently empty since it’s working day and people are still looking for money out there. They’ve been recovering from the wall-breaking disaster, yet they still haven’t found their new home.

The girl’s now crying and her cheeks look damp and ugly from the pain.

Not knowing what’s actually going on, Bertolt immediately pockets their shared wallet.

“Annie, can you at least get up first so I can carry you on my back while looking for some help?” he asks, hanging his hands up in the air because he’s not sure where to place them on her body. She still fails to speak with her mouth—afraid that her control’s slipping away—but shaking her head a little gives him an answer.

Then a thought suddenly comes to his mind and his cheeks appear red; Annie sees this and, although she’s wrong, she blames the heat of that day. The heat puts also her on the edge. Guilt stings him as the boy begins composing himself quickly.

A hand begins slipping to her upper back, another on the back of her knees. “I’m sorry, but I have to carry you this way,” says Bertolt, eyeing her face with concern while bundling her body up with the blanket, making sure the blood won’t get noticed too much. People don’t like horrifying sights on the street, after all.

Annie still doesn’t say anything to oppose him, but doesn’t struggle either when she’s being carried like a princess—she saw this position on graphic books about fairytales before. Truthfully, with the blanket, she looks more like a caterpillar. Bertolt’s carrying a huge caterpillar with blonde hair on its head. She would’ve thought they look ridiculous, like kids playing around, if the pain doesn’t take over her senses.

As he’s carrying her, she feels small in his arms. Their height and size don’t differ that much, yet he has the power to do that. He’s sweating and she can feel his hands shaking on her clothed skin. The sun shines brighter than before, but she thinks it’s because she’s heavy for a girl her age, despite them being warriors.

They’re still a kid, indeed.

They—actually, he—manage to go to a doctor nearby quickly. It turns out she’s having her first menstruation, added with cramps and severe headache. She needs to rest in bed for several days. Reiner freaks out when Bertolt tells him about what happened, then sighs in relief.

“You’re like her knight in shining armor,” teases the blonde boy and Bertolt blushes, both from the thought and his friend’s word choice. The girl also hears him in her fake sleep. “But seriously, it adds more reason for me to take care both of you. Sorry, I’m going to be there next time.”

It’s bullshit, yet both of them don’t say it out loud.

When Annie gets better a few days later, she thanks the green-eyed male. Reiner teases both of them. Redness tints Bertolt’s cheeks as he gets embarrassed—he doesn’t miss the chance to respond her with _you’re welcome_ though—and the blonde girl kicks the teaser on the shin.

* * *

Bertolt carries her the second time in their third—final—year of military training. It’s a few days before the battle of Trost, if he remembers correctly.

It’s a loud dinner, as usual, when Eren and Jean fight, _horse face_ and _suicidal bastard_ are thrown here and there. The quarrel turns into a fist fight. Some are horrified, some even provokes, and others prefer to enjoy their meal in peace after an exhausting day. Reiner and Bertolt are sitting not too far from them when it happens. The former thinks their fight isn’t dangerous enough; his meal is more important and appealing.

The taller man doesn’t spot a certain blonde girl anywhere in the room, wondering why she hasn’t shown up yet to eat. It’s common if it’s her turn to cook at the kitchen but it’s not, so he gets worried. She puts up a role as a lone wolf but she never skips her meal—there’s no way she does that as a strict diet like other girls would do willingly.

Some minutes later, Mina shows up and takes a seat in front of them. They remember the aforementioned girl as the only person who’s been sharing bed bunks with Annie since the first day of their training, as she’d told them before. The lone wolf does her job perfectly but it seems like Mina’s treating her like a dear friend, so it’s no wonder Annie treats her same, just in her own way.

Despite her meal’s already in front of her, Mina’s face shows panic.

“Hi, Mina,” calls Reiner as a greeting, while Bertolt just looks at her with a small smile and nods. “I haven’t seen Annie since this afternoon. Do you know—“

She cuts him with trembling voice, “Annie’s been in bed.” They know she’s best at getting away from the training quietly and quickly. Still, they become more worried as she continues, “She’s having her period and hurting, but she refused to go to the infirmary. So, uh, as she told me you three came from the same village, can you persuade her to go? Or maybe carry her?”

The fact that Annie had told Mina about their connection surprises them, but they're aware that it's a precaution in case she needs them but is unable to let them know. It’s dinner time and everyone’s here. Well, maybe not one person. Reiner grins at Bertolt.

“Bertl, why don’t you help her?”

The dark-haired boy doesn’t blush—he trembles instead. Be it from the embarrassment or the fright, he doesn’t know if it’s only one of them or it’s a mix of both. Although she’s definitely needing one of them _right now_ and the idea of carrying her again is appealing, the question alone is alarming for him. So he responds back, voice lower than Reiner’s before, so low Mina cannot hear him.

“Why don’t _you_? You’d promised to take care of her.”

It’s a test. Nowadays Reiner’s getting away and away, focusing on being everyone’s big brother too much he begins neglecting his two friends and (possibly) his duty. He wants to see if the bait’s taken. He wants to know if this man, who’s looking at him now in a stern expression, still keeps his mind in place and remembers why they’re here.

Those hazel-colored eyes blink in surprise, realizing his soft-spoken best friend just talked back at him in a tone he’d never heard before.

“You don’t _trust_ me.” It’s not only an utterance. Reiner does say that to Bertolt, yet, from the terrified expression on his face, it seems like he says that as a sudden realization. A punishment. A reminder that he’d just disappointed someone. He’s lucky the girl in front of them doesn’t notice what he’d said and what his face’d shown.

The blonde boy quickly finishes his dinner in silence, then gets up. The fight’s still going on so it’s a good chance to slip away from the room, although they’re only three tables away. “Very well, I’m going to get her. You two wait here,” says Reiner. Mina thanks him in relief. Bertolt only nods nervously in return.

They continue to eat in silence as they’re waiting for Reiner to return and tell them that he’s done taking Annie to the infirmary. He forgot to return the dirty plate, though. Mina’s quite a talkative person, but Bertolt is famous as a person who doesn’t talk much, so they don’t say anything.

The boy acknowledges that Reiner and Annie have been on bad terms. They fought with each other once—one with anger and fear, another with determination—so hard they bled. If he hadn’t stopped them and they aren’t monsters, they would’ve been killed by their own drive. He worries about her and cares for her deeply, sure, but they’re here not to mess around and his two fellow warriors should get along with each other in order to make this mission a success.

By the look at Reiner’s face when he shows up several minutes later, Bertolt knows he fucked it up.

Initially, Bertolt would return his dirty plate along with Reiner’s—since he’s also done eating—but the latter picks it up. There’s liquid on his left cheek, making it look a little damp; the taller boy cannot see it clearly though, due to the poor lighting.

Why did he cry though? He wants to ask about it, but his friend’s face looks like he’d just witnessed something terrifying, so he doesn’t question. Mina notices him coming yet doesn’t stop eating; she doesn’t see his face.

“You _go_ ,” orders Reiner as he scrubs his cheek with his sleeve. Bertolt sees at it and recognizes the liquid as spits, not tears. Fear creeps up onto his face instantly. “Annie said she’d only go if she’s with—“

“I DID NOTHING BUT WHY’RE YOU STILL PICKING A FIGHT YOU SHITHEAD?”

“YOU AND YOUR SUICIDAL TENDENCY IRRITATES ME, DO YOU WANT TO DIE AS A HERO THAT MUCH—“

“—you—WHY THE HELL ARE YOU STILL AT IT YOU _SICK FUCKS_ —!“

As his speech’s being interrupted, Reiner loses his temper, walking towards the fighting teenagers. Bertolt sees this as an opportunity to get away without anyone noticing, even Mina. The blonde man’s everyone big brother and treated with great respect, so his presence is far greater.

The tall man walks silently to the female dorm. He knows everyone else’s currently at the dining hall, so he enters without knocking. He’s never been here before, but apparently it’s quick to spot her because she’s laying on one of the lower bed bunks.

She’s in her usual hoodie and white pants, the military jacket’s missing. Her blonde hair isn’t tied up into the usual bun. Bertolt feels embarrassed seeing her hair down and laying down on a bed the first time since they’d stepped into adolescence.

However, Annie’s expression doesn’t look nice. He remembers.

“A—Annie,” he begins, feeling more flustered when he stutters. “I’m here to carry you to the infirmary.” He doesn’t ask like he did before because she definitely needs him to do it.

The girl stares at him tiredly; there’s still pain showing on her face, but he suspects she’s now too tired holding on. She doesn’t say anything other than a quiet _thank you_ and it’s enough. He sighs in relief as he sees her white pants and there’s no blood stain on it. Yet.

It surprises him to see a hint of anger on her face, though.

Bertolt doesn’t say sorry when he picks her up exactly like he did when they were eleven years old. It’s the same but without the blanket and feeling like a caterpillar. Annie doesn’t think it’s ridiculous anymore. It’s embarrassing to be carried like a bride, yet she doesn’t complain, too tired holding on from revealing herself and silently thanking Bertolt’s long legs—they make walking faster.

She felt small when he first carried her; now she feels even smaller. Their height difference is no joke. Bertolt’s still lanky like before, but now he’s towering her and his shoulders are way broader. His hands also aren’t shaking much anymore against her clothed skin, showing how stronger he gets throughout the years yet still nervous around her. His hold is secure, reminding her of her father when she was a little girl who used to be carried around.

Annie’s thinking why Bertolt’s so silent when he suddenly asks, “Why’d you spit on Reiner’s face?”

She blinks, her blue eyes widened in surprise. Among the three of them, Reiner’s the most talkative and loudest one, making Bertolt and Annie skilled in perceiving things quietly and observing from the corner. No wonder he’d noticed that.

But she’s not in the mood for explaining as her lower stomach’s throbbing. “This poor lady’s enjoying her suffering time when something ugly showed up,” joked she, with a bored tone.

Bertolt doesn’t treat it as a joke.

“Did he do something that upset you?”

“No shit. I bet now he’s putting up a fucking show of separating Eren and Jean.”

“Annie.”

“Bertolt,” she calls him by his name after a moment and, if the tone and context were different, he’d find it sweet. He’d crave for more. He didn’t. She continues, “I was having a hard time and he showed up and told me he’d take care of me.”

The boy frowns and understands at the same time. He responds anyway, “Isn’t it good? He’d promised us that before.”

Annie grits her teeth, both from the inflicting pain on her stomach and anger. Venom dripping from her lips when she barks.

“I don’t need him playing his big brother shit on me. It’s disgusting enough that he plays it in front of everyone else. We’ve been wanting to go home since forever and here he is instead, pretending like he’s fucking babysitting us.”

Bertolt knows Annie swears a lot despite her aloof demeanor, particularly when she gets mad about something, so he says nothing. Replying her only adds fuel to the fire. He strongly agrees with her, though, as Reiner blending well—too well, actually—with people inside the wall is greatly disturbing and saddening at the same time.

They go into the infirmary—no one’s inside the room, the staffs probably still eating too—and the dark-haired boy places the blonde girl on one of the beds. He doesn’t know which medicine is for menstrual pain and nor does she, so he’s getting one of the staffs to come.

When he’s walking towards the door, Annie says out of nowhere, “Thank you.” Bertolt stops and turns his heels, fully facing her with a confused blink. In spite of her flat tone and not smiling, he knows it’s genuine. “You treat a girl very well even when you’re nervous.” His cheeks are reddening as she continues, body limp and tired and laying down on the bed, probably not even really conscious with what she’s said, “Your shoulders are very broad—you’d better let your daughter sits on them one day.”

If the situation was different, Bertolt would faint from the accumulated embarrassment. It’s a very rare occasion for Annie to complement him, let alone with her dreamy voice—probably her unusual way of thanking him for carrying her. She even brought up the topic of him having children, hinting he might be a good father figure instead of a brother. However, he turns his back on her so she doesn’t need to see his face. He doesn’t know if his expression now is pleasantly looking.

“We both know it’s not going to happen.”

* * *

Annie breaks free from her crystal and Bertolt doesn’t hold her the third time.


End file.
